End of January

The end of January all ready... wow! I still write 200, and then pause, go back, and sneak a 1 in between the last 2 zeros - but at least I am pausing now before barrelling ahead with a 9. We're still here! It has been quite a month in the Marsh annals. We spent the last half of December, and the first half of January dealing with David's health. Thankfully, we have some answers now, and are figuring out what life will look like now.

From many perspectives, life is back to normal - David's back at work, school is continuing, we are enjoying the outdoor weather (see above photo!), are making plans again...

In other ways, things are quite different. There are whole new regions of the human body that I know a lot more about, I have a much better understanding of how hospitals work, and I feel thankful for so many more things that I think I have been taking for granted. Here are a few:

1. Our Friends and Family (Our Support Network in brief!) - Whether they are church, homeschooling, have blood ties, or some other connection - we have a pretty amazing bunch of people out there who were quick to offer anything we needed. From snowshovelling, to laundry, babysitting, or delivering a Thermos of tea to the emergency room, we were covered. It is humbling to be so supported. How did I take all of them (you) for granted?

2. The Peace of God - I don't think I can fully describe some of the moments I have lived through in the past 6 weeks. There is a despair to being up in the night, when you are incredibly tired, with a person who is in so much pain they just want to give up. There is an anxiety to hearing "there is "something" there" and wondering what exactly it is. It is unnerving to walk in to a hospital time after time, past the signs for "oncology" and "palliative care" wondering if I will be turning down that hallway in the future. It is hard to sit (anywhere) in a hospital and wait -for your name to be called, for the doctor, for the test, for the result, for the next IV drug... It is wearing to try to be two places at once - to feel you are not just wanted, but needed, by two groups of people at the same time, and most of your time feels like it is spent in driving, and parking. And we won't mention laundry, dishes, meals, the afore-mentioned snow, school schedules, funerals, parking tickets (grr), and bell choirs. However, through the trials I can testify that I had peace - anxieties, worries, yes - but under it all a deep peace that we were in the Lord's hands, and this was all from Him. No panic. Good sleep. Not sure what was coming, but knowing that He would give what we needed to meet it. Now, this is something I did not take for granted at the time, I was a little amazed how peaceful I felt, but I know that I do not always acknowledge the peace the Lord gives in my day-to-day life.

3. Prayer Support - We had a lot of people praying for us, including David's aunt who is a nun and 64 other sisters in her community. And I believe that the peace I felt, and the way the household didn't fall apart, the energy I had, and the quick recovery David is making is thanks to a huge amount (probably more than I know) of prayer. I know I have taken prayer for granted in the past.

4. How Good We Have It - The Haiti earthquake hit the day after David was admitted to hospital. What a great way to get some perspective. And I know people who have gone through, and are going through, much worse with the health of their loved ones. I can take my life for granted, the good things God has given us. A trial can quickly establish perspective - we have it so good.

So these are some things I repent of taking for granted, and I am sincerely thankful for. There's a lot more I have learned, but that may have to wait for another time!